I recently met a man at an event who I found to be a terrible show-off. He just couldn’t stop talking about how he lived at home with his parents. Fortunately I didn’t have to tolerate his bragging very long because when the single ladies in the room caught wind of his circumstances he was snapped right up. I went home that night reminiscing about better days gone by when I never had to drive myself anywhere, when bills were never in my name and when dinner would be on the table every night at 6 pm on the dot and was never made by me.
These days, in the city at least, the words ‘and I live with my parents’ are not usually accompanied with “my name is George. I’m unemployed.” People are back at home for many different reasons. Studying for an MBA or, paying off debt, or saving for a down payment, for example. So living at home can often be a sign of upward social mobility rather than the passé downward freefall in social mobility. As more people are returning home it’s becoming normal and so there’s less of a stigma no matter what the reason is.
...as more and more adult kids return home the expectation that their parents will support them in this decision is assumed.
Every parent wants to see their children happy and successful but if your kids are showing signs of boomeranging right back then you need to know that you have the right to choose whether or not you will support them financially in their endeavours. If you cannot afford to support them financially then you need to speak up sooner rather than later. If you’re feeling guilty about not being able to financially support capable, adult children then let’s talk a little about types of expenses namely discretionary expenses and non-discretionary expenses.
If you’re an employed adult moving back home to save for something or to support a change in lifestyle then take the time to think about what it will cost your parents and talk to them.
Non-discretionary expenses are the essentials of life like rent or mortgage payments, food and utilities. Discretionary expenses are the opposite, nonessentials, like vacations, your golf membership and your capable, employed adult children. If you can’t afford everything or if you’re feeling the pinch then the first area you cut back indiscriminately is discretionary expenses. If non-discretionary expenses include debts outside of your mortgage look at paying down the debt faster with a debt consolidation loan in order to free up money. Know that in the long term you are actually helping your kids if it means that they will not have to support you financially in your retirement.
If you’re an employed adult moving back home to save for something or to support a change in lifestyle then take the time to think about what it will cost your parents and talk to them. Your parents are not always going to tell you if they are experiencing financial difficulty.
Frequently Asked Questions
Have a question? We are here to help.
What is a Debt Consolidation Program?
A Debt Consolidation Program (DCP) is an arrangement made between your creditors and a non-profit credit counselling agency. Working with a reputable, non-profit credit counselling agency means a certified Credit Counsellor will negotiate with your creditors on your behalf to drop the interest on your unsecured debts, while also rounding up all your unsecured debts into a single, lower monthly payment. In Canada’s provinces, such as Ontario, these debt payment programs lead to faster debt relief!
Can I enter a Debt Consolidation Program with bad credit?
Yes, you can sign up for a DCP even if you have bad credit. Your credit score will not impact your ability to get debt help through a DCP. Bad credit can, however, impact your ability to get a debt consolidation loan.
Do I have to give up my credit cards in a Debt Consolidation Program?
Will Debt Consolidation hurt my credit score?
Most people entering a DCP already have a low credit score. While a DCP could lower your credit score at first, in the long run, if you keep up with the program and make your monthly payments on time as agreed, your credit score will eventually improve.
Can you get out of a Debt Consolidation Program?
Anyone who signs up for a DCP must sign an agreement; however, it's completely voluntary and any time a client wants to leave the Program they can. Once a client has left the Program, they will have to deal with their creditors and collectors directly, and if their Counsellor negotiated interest relief and lower monthly payments, in most cases, these would no longer be an option for the client.
